Vegas Baby!

Vegas Baby!

When the economy was good, I would attend company conferences.  This story happens in Vegas at one of those conferences.  I’m a Vegas Virgin and am excited and ready to pop that cherry.    

Maddie was joining me and Coco was meeting us after our conference.  We were all so excited and of course, had to do the mandatory shopping event.  Bathing suits, skirts, cute tops and of course shoes!  I made sure to pack my expensive camera that Hose Head bought me before we broke up.  The infamous camera my sister got so upset that I received because he should have spent the money on a ring.  Now that we are no longer together I was happy to have this really nice camera.  I wanted to make sure to capture the digital memories of the debauchery we were going to experience.  You know, like the end of the movie The Hangover when they show all the pictures of the night they can’t remember.

Maddie and I arrive in Vegas and had plenty of time to spare before our conference started.  We checked into our hotel, Paris, checked out the pool, gambled, shopped and decided why not grab a beer.  We stopped off at one of the casino bars and were instantly talking to the cute bartenders.  They gave us the heads up on what to see and do.  The bartenders were very influential on us having our second beer.  Oh why not?  We’re in Vegas!  I’ve never had a drink before work, probably will never again but you become a different person when you touchdown in the land of sin. 

We make it to the conference, busting in laughing and having a great time.  We may have even hic-up’d.  I almost felt guilty until I see that everyone else there was doing the same.  They didn’t want to be cooped up in a conference when they were in Vegas either.

After two days of listening to corporate, I get a text from Coco telling me she’s checked into the hotel and will meet us at the pool.  I almost scream a Whoo Hooo out loud.  Our Vegas trip is about to start.  I have so much excited energy; I can’t stop moving in my seat.  I want out.  I feel the anticipation in the room and look around to see a lot of toe tapping and checking watches.  Everyone wants out to play in Sin-City.

Once the last words are said, everyone runs out of the conference room like it was their last day of school.   If George Castanza was in the room, all the woman and children would have been plowed through.  But, these are not kids or cast members from Sienfield and they are not running to the nearest park to play or running from a fire but running to the nearest bar with gambling, drinking and wayward, mischievous thoughts running through their heads. 

Maddie and I run back to our room and change quickly into our swimsuits.  We are poolside in 10 minutes flat.  We see Coco laying on her chaise lounge in her cute bikini, legs crossed, drinking a beer and looking very comfortable.  It’s like she owns the place. 

“Nice sock mark Cheetahtort!”  Coco says while laughing and putting her hands behind her head.

I had worn pants with tight socks all day and now notice the extremely unattractive sock mark on my legs. 

Why oh why did she have to point it out especially since Bruce, a co-worker and a crush I’ve had for years is sitting next to her. 

Bruce tries to hide his smile while I turn 3 shades of red. 

“This look doesn’t work?”  I say to Queen Sheeba.  “Thanks Coco and welcome to Vegas!”  I say laughing. 

“Works for me.” Says Bruce “Need a beer ladies?” He continues.

“I have a bucket of beers right here.” Says Coco.

“Yes, I need one of those.”  Maddie and I say in unison.

We lay ourselves down, take a pull from our beers and start enjoying what Vegas truly has to offer.

After a few hours by the pool, taking in the scenery of all the good looking people, we decide to head back to our rooms to get ready for our first official night out.  

We get ready with a bottle of Champagne.  We take one last look at ourselves and head to the first stop, the hotel bar that we have affectionately named “The Circle Bar” or maybe that’s the actual name of the bar.  I’m not really sure.

We walk up – feeling confident as there are more men here than woman.  I think the ratio might be 10 to 1.  We like these odds.   Since this is a company conference, we have a lot of our co-workers with us.  This has a bit of an advantage to it.  They buy our drinks because they feel so guilty for all the work they’ve had us do over the year.  We accept happily.

We see Paul, another co-worker, with three beautiful men and we hope he will be introducing us.

My friends are drooling, but we try to gather ourselves and pose for them.   Luckily we have plenty of liquid courage.    

We find out these men are from Australia.  We love the accents and come unglued.  That alone can get us up in a hotel room alone.  One of them instantly connects themselves to Maddie.        

 “Well, look at you.  Aren’t you pretty.” he says to Maddie in his seductive Australian accent.    The look on her face is priceless.

Her reply when she’s got her mojo going (and she does) is “do you want to make out?”

He does.  So they do.

Another Aussie has his eye on Coco.  I look over to her and she can’t take her eyes off him.  She has him in her trance.  He’s a lucky guy. 

I realize I’m standing there alone.  This has got to change.

Both Maddie and Coco come up to me and say in unison again “The Australians want to take us to Treasure Island.”

“Cool, let’s do it.”  I say not wanting to be the odd man out. 

We get to Treasure Island.  The line/wait for the bar we really wanted to get into was about an hour and a half long.  We walk into another bar.  Maddie and Coco resume their make-out sessions with their beautiful Australian men.  I’m smiling like a proud mother watching her girls. 

They are soaking up all the Vegas experiences and I’m standing around watching them do it.  I need to find someone to make out with.

 “Should we go back to Paris - the Circle Bar?” Says Josie, another co-worker.

“Sure.  We know more people there.”

We say our goodbyes to Maddie and Coco wishing them to have a great time. 

We walk out of the hotel and a man instantly walks up to us.  It was a little unnerving.

“Ladies!  We have a limo, do you want to ride with us?”

I stumble just a bit and look at the man talking to us. 

“Do we?” I say trying not to come off too drunk.

“Yes, you do.” answers the same man wearing his proper-business suit.  Proper business man?  Is there such a thing? 

“I’m trying to entertain the men that work for me tonight.  I have a limo, drinks and all I need is beautiful women.  Will you join us?” 

I walk up to the limousine driver and say “Is it safe?”

“Of course it is.” He says in return wth a look on his face that says silly girl.

I get Josie and me into the limo.  Am I really taking the limo driver’s word that these men are safe?  This has to be the most stupid move I’ve ever made.

“Cheetahtort, I’m very sure these guys are not going to do anything with us.  Let’s just have fun.” says Josie, while she’s holding out her hand for a glass of Champagne. 

She’s about three sheets to the wind.  Will I have to fight for my life and take care of her at the same time?  Should I be doing this?  I’m having a struggle with the two angels on my shoulders.  “Do it!”  “Don’t do it!” 

“Cheetahtort, is that your name?!  I’m Ricky.  Here’s a glass of Champagne.  Enjoy and welcome to Vegas!”

O.K.  I’m in.  Let’s enjoy this ride I think, as I see Josie ask for another glassful.

The limo drops us off at Excaliber. 

As we walk into the pyramid-shaped building, Ricky pays for everyone’s $25 cover charge.  I do my math and figure that he paid $175 to get his whole party into the bar.  Nice.

“I’m thirsty.”  Josie slurs to Ricky. 

Ricky is ready to remedy this situation.  “Carl, go grab us drinks.” He hands over $100 to one of his men.  Poor Carl, he must be Ricky’s lackey. 

Ricky puts his arm around me and smiles because he knows he’s the boss and has everything under control.    

“Tell Carl what you want, Baby.”  Ricky says to me and then looks at Josie thinking the same thing.  We give our orders shrugging to each other and thinking we can get used to this!

Carl comes back to us with the correct drink orders.

Ricky grabs my waist and says “Let’s dance.” 

As he pulls me to the dance floor I notice we are the only people dancing.  Is this a lame bar?  I don’t want to be the only people dancing.

But he has his arms around me and it feels good.  He’s been very authoritative throughout the evening with his men, but at this moment he starts to say romantic words in my ear.  You look so beautiful., I want to get to know you.  I’m so lucky to have found you outside Teasure Island.  Will you be mine?  I want you to be mine.  For at least tonight.

For at least tonight??  HA!  What did I expect to hear?  I’m in Vegas!  I start laughing at him and he smiles back.

“Let’s go back to Paris.” Ricky says to his men and grabs my hand.

Josie looks a little dissappointed by this announcement.  I’m alright with it as I would like to see what our friends are up to.

We all pile back into the limo.

When we pull into Paris, Ricky gets a phone call.  Once he gets off the phone he yells to the limo driver “Take us to Manderin!”

“Oh no, I’m off here!”  I say to Ricky.

Ricky has his look that says, Honey, I get what I want, and you are coming with us, on his face.

“Oh no you don’t, I want you to come with us to the Manderin.  Josie can go check on your friends, but I want you with me.”

“I’m sorry Ricky – I’m staying here.  But I hope you have a great time!  Come on Josie – let’s get back to our friends.”

Josie is so far gone that she just does whatever I say.  She still looks a little dissapointed but walks back into the Paris with me.

I turn around to see Ricky all pissed off and slaming the door of the limo and screaming another order to the driver.

My friends Maddie and Coco are waiting for Josie and I with huge smiles on their faces.  But yell “Where the hell have you been?  Did you just get dropped off in a limo?”  We tell them our story and they tell us theirs. . . .

Once we left them, Coco and Maddie and the cute Australians left Treasure Island to go to the top of The Palms.  (I’m bummed as I want to get to the top of The Palms.)  The Australians buy their way into the club.  Once in the bar, Maddie and Coco run to the ladies room.  When they get out they notice the Australians being kicked out of the bar.  One of them is able to say to them while being escorted out “We got into a fight and they are making us leave!  Meet us at Belagio!”

Coco and Maddie look at each other, shrug their shoulders and laugh.  Maddie says to Coco “Well, we’re here, we didn’t have to pay the cover charge, let’s enjoy ourselves.” 

“Exactly.  Let’s get a drink.”  says Coco. 

The four of us were satisfied with our nights and decided to call it a night – or morning as it was 4 a.m.

We all get up early the next morning to lay out by the pool.  Well almost all of us.  Maddie is a vampire.  She hates the sun.  She’d be happy with clouds and rain every day.  So she went out and about Vegas; perusing the different hotels, looking at the art and doing a bit of shopping.

The rest of us spent the day at the pool drinking buckets of beer and re-lived our evening with the guys we work with.  They were in rough shape.  They had gone to strip clubs and spent their money on cheap women and drinks. 

That night, the guys invited us to a private party at The Palms.  They told us everything there was free.  Food and alcohol!  We were in.

The party was held at a fabulous club named Skin.  They had cabana type cubes with curtains hanging and a light shining behind.  Young, sexy women danced behind the curtains revealing only the outline of their bodies.  Very sexy.  They also had beautiful waitresses walking through the crowds with trays of appetizers.  Very swanky.

As Maddie and I are checking out the club, we notice that the men to women ratio once again is high. 

We run into a couple other guys we work with, Terry and Dan.  They are the office clowns and have everyone constantly laughing.  A waitress walked by with her tray of sushi and Terry grabbed the entire tray and started shoving the food into his mouth.  We all followed suit, trying not to choke on our fish.   

We soon found our way back to our friends when I saw this very tall good-looking man. 

“Maddie – look.”  I pointed him out to her.  “I want to meet him.”

She looks over to the tall good-looking stranger and does something she never does.  She walks over to him and starts talking.  I stand there with my mouth wide open.  Why oh why couldn’t I do that?!

Turns out she’s talking to him about me.  She then turns to me and says “Cheetahtort – come here I want you to meet Joshua!”

I walk over, smiling.  I’m about to meet this tall beautiful man and happy because she makes it happen. 

“Hi.”  I say to the beautiful stranger.

“Hello, Cheetahtort – is it?” He says in a beautiful Australian accent.  He’s smiling at me and I melt.

All I can do is smile back with doe eyes.

“Cheetahtort! This is Joshua.  He’s from our Australia office.”

I’m still standing there not saying anything.  I need to shake myself and get a grip!  A good-looking Australian is vying for my attention.

“Hi Joshua, it’s very nice to meet you.” I say, barely audible.

He laughs and grabs my waist and brings me closer to him.

“You are adorable Cheetahtort!  Let’s get another drink.”

I look over to Maddie and mouth the words “I’m in love and THANK YOU!” while I’m being pulled away.

If Maddie were telling this story she would say that’s the last she saw of me that night.  Oh who am I kidding.  I’m telling the story and I’d say the same thing!

I tell him I’ll buy since all the drinks are free.  We both order vodka Red Bulls because they are so tasty.  We end up on a couch and talk forever; I am mesmerized by his accent.  We discussed his job in Australia.  He was the managing director of the Sydney office.  He told me about his car - a Mazzarati.  I thought he was a bit of a bragger – but I didn’t care.  I was with a good-looking rich Australian that wanted to be with me.  I was in heaven.

While we were talking, I get a call from Josie. 

“Cheetahtort!  Where are you?  Did you leave with that Australian?”

“No!  I’m over here!  Look to your left!”  I say waving my hands in the air.

“Oh good, we were worried.  Are you OK?”

“I’ve never been better.”  I say looking at Joshua.  He smiles and gives me a small kiss on the lips.

I thought I was in heaven before – Now I know I am.

“Have fun!  Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” Josie says and hangs up.

“I want to gamble a bit Cheetahtort, will you come with me?”  Joshua asks standing up and taking my hand.

“You bet.”  No pun intended.  I say in return not wanting to leave him.

I’ve got a huge smile on my face and am waving to my friends as we walk by.  I can tell by the faces of the men I work with that they were wondering who the hell does Cheetahtort have in her grips.  My girlfriends had a look on their faces that said “If that were us, she’d be so mad!”

At that moment I didn’t care what they thought – I was in Vegas and I was going to have a great time. They’d being doing the same thing if they were in my shoes.

I honestly didn’t think at the time that I wasn’t going to see them for the rest of the night or I would have talked to them.  I thought I would be back.  But I didn’t come back.

We walked into the casino.  Joshua walked up to a table.  He didn’t even sit down.  He put $1,000 down.  I looked at him like, are you crazy?

He lost.

“Oh my God!  You just lost $1,000!!!!  I’m so sorry!”

“Cheetahtort, it’s just money.”  He said calmly.

My eyes bugged out.  That’s my house payment that he just lost and it didn’t affect him at all!

We continued walking.  We stop by another table.  Again, he doesn’t sit down but puts down another $1,000.  He loses again!

“Oh Joshua – I’m sorry, I should have told you, I’m the cooler!”  (The “cooler” comes from the movie The Cooler with William H. Macy where he had such a sorry life that the casinos placed him by winners so his bad luck would rub off of them and they’d start losing.)

“What?  You’re not the cooler, Cheetahtort, you’re my lucky charm!”

I thought that was sweet to say but oh so foolish.

We walk up to another table holding hands and I break away from his hold and take a few steps back.  He smiles and laughs at me thinking I’m being silly.

He loses again.

I shake my head and am feeling horrible for this man.

He laughs and admits “Maybe you are the cooler.  Go step behind that pillar while I make this next bet.”

I do, as I want to help him anyway I can and I truly believe I am the cooler.

He still loses.

“Oh well, let’s go get a cocktail.  I’m thirsty after losing so much money.” He says not caring.

Out of the blue, he grabs me and plants a hungry kiss on my lips.  I forget about the money.

Wouldn’t normal people be extremely upset that they just lost $4,000?  That was four house payments for me!  What I could do with that kind of money!  But now I don’t even care about the money because I’m woozy on the kiss he just gave me.

We walk into Rain, the bar in The Palms, hand in hand.  He has such a beautiful smile on his face.  He looks like he’s having the time of his life. 

“Stay here while I go get us a couple drinks.”  He says to me and leans down to plant another kiss on my lips.

Where am I going to go?  I’d stay here forever if it meant I could be with him.

While I was waiting I felt a hand come across my waist. 

“Cheetahtort!  I’m so glad I’m running into you.”

It was Ricky from the night before. 

“Ricky!” I say enthusiastically.  “It’s so nice to see you again!”

“Dance with me.” Rickey says – in his authoritative voice.

“I’m sorry, I’m here with someone else.”  Once I get the words out, I feel Joshua’s hands circle my waist.

“Oh.” Ricky says giving Joshua a look that I couldn’t read.

“Have a good night, Cheetahtort.”

“You too.”

This didn’t even phase Joshua.  He just gave me my drink and another kiss.

We walked around the bar for a bit until we found a dark secluded area and started to make out.  (Take that Maddie and Coco!)  Once again, Heaven.  I didn’t care who was there or who was watching and wanting us to get a room.  I was enjoying every moment.

I feel my phone buzz in my purse.  

I struggle to answer my phone in time while trying to answer every kiss.  “Hello?”

“Cheetahtort!  Are you OK?  We left and went back to the Circle Bar!” 

“I’m good Coco!  I’m having more fun that should be allowed.”  I say drunk-like.  Not from the booze but from his delicious kisses.

Joshua laughs and motions for me to put my phone away.

“I’ll see you soon – I hope you are having a good time too!  Talk to you later.”

“Be good! But most of all, be good at it.”  She laughs and hangs up.

Joshua continues kissing me with full force.  I’m taken aback by the passion he’s showing especially in public.  But again – I’m just reveling in it!  I never experience this and want to soak it all up!

He takes my hand and leads me to the dance floor.  We dance so close I can feel his boomerang.  We continued kissing and dancing forgetting that we are in public. 

“Should we get back to Paris?”  Joshua says between kisses.

“Sure.”  I say disappointed because I don’t want this to end but also wanting my friends to meet him.

We head out to the cab stand.  I start to get in line when he says “Oh Cheetahtort – I don’t take cabs – I only take limos.”

Oh goodness.

We get into the limo and he pulls me on top of his lap, holds my chin and says “I’ve had the best night with you Cheetahtort.” Then kisses me so gently. 

I pull away light-headed and all gooey on the insides.

“We need a picture together.”  I say in a fog.

“No wait, I want a picture of you alone first.” he says in return.  He backs up and I pose with a glass of champagne in my hand. 

“Beautiful.”  He says.  “Now let’s get one together.”

He puts his right arm around my waist and gets close to me and holds out the camera with his long left arm and takes the picture.  We then make out for the rest of the trip back to Paris.

It was the fastest ride I’ve ever taken – Dammit!  Why couldn’t it have been from New York to California!

We arrive at Paris.  He gets out and takes my hand and helps me out of the limo.  We walk hand in hand and I feel like I’m floating on Cloud 9. 

Maddie and Coco see me walking in and run up to me.  “What?  You can’t take cabs anymore?  You’re too good for cabs?!”  They say laughing at me.  “You’re glowing Cheetahtort!  What have you been up to?!” Says Maddie with a devious smile.

I step away from Joshua so I can talk to Maddie without him hearing. He reluctantly lets go of my hand.  “I’ve been making out with the beautiful Australian.  I’ve got pictures – I’ll show you later.”  I say as I look down at my purse and notice I’m not holding my camera. 

“It looks like it.  I can’t wait to hear all about it!” Says Coco.

“WAIT!!!!!  I don’t have my camera!”  I yell and run for the door with Maddie and Coco following.

The limo is gone.  I look at the men standing there watching over Paris. 

“I left my camera in the back of that Limo!”  I yell while Coco and Maddie are trying to calm me.

“Call this number, I’m sure they’ll have it for you.” Says one of the men like this has happened a thousand times before.

I’m totally distraught as I had some awesome pictures on that camera! And it was a really nice camera!

“We’ll call in the morning Cheetahtort, don’t worry, we’ll get it back.”  Says Maddie putting an arm around me and we walk back into Paris.

We grab a couple more drinks and I look around to find Joshua.  He’s sitting with his friends.  He looks like he’s telling them a story. 

I make my way over to the men that I work with and they start to ask me questions about Joshua.  I start telling them who he is, when I hear . . .

“Cheetahtort – get over here.”  I get excited that Joshua’s calling me over – but then again, I’m not too sure how I feel about being summoned.

I look over to him to see him gesturing with his fingers for me to come hither.  I shake my head and do the same gesture back to him.  I’m thinking this man gets whatever he wants.  Maybe he should come to me.

He doesn’t budge.  So, yep – I go over to him.  I hate myself for giving in.

He pulls in his lap and introduces me to his friends.  I do my best not to embarrass myself.

I see my friends wanting me to return to them.  I get up, tell his friends it was very nice to meet them and return to my own.

Bruce is sitting against the bar starring at me. 

“What’s with the look?” 

“What are you doing Cheetahtort?  Who is this guy?  Are you being safe?”

The guy I’ve had a crush on for so long is worried about me.  This makes me stop to think.  What am I doing? 

I like this guy.  Bruce hasn’t done anything to make me think he likes me.  So why not have some fun in Vegas?

Bruce stands up, puts his arms around me and says “just be careful.”

I pull away and say “Always am.  Bruce, thank you, don’t worry, I’m good.”

At that moment, I feel arms surrounding me.

I turn to see Joshua.  He pulls me to him and says “Should I be jealous?”

He pulls me aside, and says “Come with me.”

I do.

I’m amazed what this man can have me do.  I’m so used to saying “No!”

I turn around and see my friends with worried looks.  I appreciate their concern because they don’t know him.  I don’t know either.  Should I be worried?    

We walk hand in hand to the elevators and I realize we are going to his hotel room.  I start to panic.  I’m not this kind of girl.  I don’t do such things.

We get to his room.  He leads me in and we walk to the bed.  We sit down and he starts kissing me.  This is wonderful, but I’m nervous.  Obviously, this man wants everything.  His mouth moves away from mine and down my throat.  His hands start to move up my waist to my breasts.  This all feels wonderful – but again I’m thinking I don’t know this man.  I shouldn’t be here.

“Joshua, I’m not sure about this.”

“Hmmmmmm.”  He says while kissing my neck and lower.

“That feels good.” I say but then shake myself.  “I shouldn’t be doing this.” 

“Shouldn’t be doing what?” he says as he continues lower. 

I’m loving this, but I shake myself again and say “I’m so sorry Joshua, I’m not feeling comfortable, maybe we should go back to the bar.”

“Whatever” he says rolling his eyes and continues exploring.

What happened to the gentleman that I was with earlier?  I felt very disappointed but not surprised.

I break away again, “Really, I don’t feel comfortable.”

“You’re serious?  Fine!” he shouts angrily.   

I’m surprised by his outburst and think I should leave.

“Just lay here with me then.  I like the feel of you.”  He says softly.  It was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide.

He soon fell asleep.  I try my best to squirm my way out of his arms without waking him.  It reminds me of a “Friends” episode where Chandler tries to sneak out of bed from a girl he’s with but accidentally breaks her arm in the process.

I get away and he doesn’t wake up.  I get dressed and stealthy get myself out of the hotel room carrying my bra.  I feel kind of bad leaving him without saying goodbye – but it’s not like I’ll ever see him again anyway.  He lives in Australia.

I walk out to the elevator bay.  It’s bright out.  I need my sunglasses!  What time is it?

I punch the elevator button knowing I have to go all the way down to the ground floor to get to the next elevator bay to go up to my room.

The elevator opens and there are two cute girls in it.  I get in feeling awkward holding my bra.  On the next floor a tall good-looking man gets in.  He checks out the two girls and says “Looks like the two of you are going to the pool!”

I take a look at myself and think What on Earth do I look like?, Still in the clothes from last night, carrying my bra and with makeup down my chin!  I was making the huge WALK OF SHAME!  My Mother would be so proud.

I finally get back to my hotel room.  I don’t have a key and have to knock.  Coco answers the door.

“Let’s go back down to the Circle Bar for one last one” she says.

“Sure, it’s only 8:00 a.m. – let’s go!” I say like we do this every weekend.

We get down to the bar and order a beer. 

“Let’s see the photos you took last night.” Says Coco.

I open my purse for my camera and remember that I lost my camera.  I can’t believe the luck – I forgot it in the back of the limo.  I’m so upset that I did such a foolish thing by leaving my camera in the back of a limo, knowing darn well that wasn’t the only foolish thing I did, but I really wished I had the photos to show my friends the night I had just experienced.  Oh well, I guess what happens in Vegas really stays in Vegas.

We continue drinking our beer and we see the men we work with, with their suitcases getting ready to leave, or having breakfast.  They see us with beer in hand and with the same clothes we were wearing the night before and shake their heads.   I hear one of the men yell . . .

“Cheetahtort!  How was Australia?!”

Vegas.  I love it!