Meet Your New Mommy!

O.K., so I work a part-time job at a local liquor/wine shop.   This job helps me pay for these lousy dates when I have to.  I would never expect the date buy my drinks or dinner when I know I will never see them again.  That is not what some of my friends think.  They think the man should always buy.  What do you think?

If there are men out there going on as many bad dates as I am plus paying for the dates 100% of the time, I would think they would go broke.  Broke for nothing!  Not even a kiss in return.     

Well, anyway – back to my part-time job . . . 

The bonus of this part-time job is the opportunity to meet a lot of interesting people and I have a lot of “regulars” that come in to visit.  I’m pretty much stuck behind that counter and many times people just want to chat.  I’m their bartender “Issac from The Love Boat, or Sam from Cheers” and they all just want/need someone to talk to.  I’m more than willing to oblige as it helps make the time move along faster.

Today’s story will be about one “regular” in particular that came in all the time.  He would buy a case of beer at least three times a week!  Seriously, three times a week!   It could have been more, but that’s the amount of times I work a week and he was in every night I worked.  Who can drink that much?  What does his liver look like? 

He was a nice enough guy, very long dirty blonde hair.  He seemed shy as he didn’t say much.  He would just walk in, smile at me, get his case of beer, smile some more, say just a few words, blush, pay for his beer and tell me to have a nice day and leave.  I really didn’t think too much about him. He was just my shy, case of beer a day, regular.  Until one day he came in with very short hair!  I did a double take.    

“Wow! – you cut your hair!  Why?”  I said when I finally realized who he was.

 He told me he had a very close friend that had brain cancer.  He purposely grew out his hair to donate it one day to Locks of Love.  Well, being the softy that I am, I was caught up with his story and had to ask him a million questions.  A small friendship started.  We would have a little more small talk each time he came in.  I found out he lives near my friend Maddie out in Autumn Park.  I told him I go out that way all the time, especially during the summer.  “Actually I might be going out there this weekend to go to Lake Side Bar.” 

“Really, well, maybe I’ll see you!” He said excitedly.

He came in the store the following Monday to get his case of beer.  “I looked for you at Lake Side.  Did you go?  I didn’t see you.”

“No, a couple things came up and we were unable to get there.  Did you have a good time?”

“Sure, but I WENT to see you.  I was a little disappointed I didn’t.”  He said with a hint of resentment in his voice.  Maybe I was imagining it – was he mad?  We didn’t make a date.  I was just informing a friend/acquaintance that I might go to a bar in his neighborhood.  (This was my first pink flag.)

“I’m sorry – we just had a change of plans.” I said dismissing it.

During the following weeks, we’d have our small talks and he would continually ask when I was coming out to his neck of the woods again.  “Are you ever coming out to Lake Side again?”  He said in front of a couple co-workers of mine.  They gave me a look that screamed – is this guy asking you out???

“Ha!  Yes, actually –I’m going to be out there this Friday celebrating a girlfriend’s birthday.”

He gives me a huge smile and says “Well, I hope I get to see you!”

I get out of work early on that Friday.  My friends and I head out to Big Lake to go boating.  It’s a bunch of us, about four boats total.  We tie the boats together and have a middle-of-the-lake party.  We have a number of cocktails, play water sports, listen to good music, ski, tube and lay in the sun.  We had a great time. 

We are out in the sun for a good 5 or 6 hours.  We decide to go home, eat and maybe take a nap before we go out for the evening festivities at Lake Side.

Once home, we eat and lay down for a nap.  I don’t like to nap.  When I nap I get more tired so this is never a good idea in my book.  This is exactly what happens.  Maddie and I are sawing logs and it takes a lot of effort from the birthday girl to get us up and out.   We are so tired and really don’t want to go.  All we want to do is relax and enjoy a night in.  But Birthday Girl won’t have it.  So we get ready and go. 

Lake Side Bar is packed!  Packed with young beautiful people!  I look at Maddie and say “I need a cocktail!”  As I say this – I see “once long hair/now short hair guy” (OLHNSH) walking my way with a big smile on his face.

 “You made it!  I didn’t think you were going to come again! When I didn’t see you here I walked over to Rascal’s to see if you decided to go there instead.  When I didn’t see you there I came back here.  I’ve been waiting for two hours and you are now finally here!  I thought you might stand me up again!”  He says so fast it was hard to keep up with him.  I felt like he was really upset at first then truly relieved that I finally showed up.

Why on earth would he walk to the two bars looking for me?  Why would he wait for me for two hours?  THIS ISN’T A DATE! (2^nd pink flag)

“I’m sorry – we took a nap and it took a lot of coaxing to get us going” I say nervously and smile at him.  I’m not sure I’m keen on someone I don’t know and haven’t made plans with getting upset with me that I wasn’t  there on time.  There wasn’t a date and time set up!  I even forgot I told him I’d be there. 

“I’m getting a drink – you want one?”  I look over to Maddie and she looks at me with a furrowed brow. 

“Who the hell is this guy?”  she says quietly so only I can hear. 

As we are getting our drinks – I whisper in her ear “This is the ‘regular’ I was telling you about.” 

I introduce the two of them.  I tell Maddie that OLHNSH comes in the liquor store every night to buy a case of beer.  She looks at me with wide eyes and I know what she’s thinking because I’m thinking the same thing!  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  WHO DRINKS THAT MUCH? 

He laughs and says – “Cheetahtort – I don’t actually drink all those cases!  I only come in the store to see you and feel like I need to buy something!”

I smile at him but I know that’s not 100% true.  He could buy a six pack or a single can of beer – but a whole case?   

With drinks in hand, we actually find a place to sit, which was a miracle as the place was so crowded.  I was drinking an Electric Lemonade.  They are so delicious and I needed the extra push to liven up.  Maddie wasn’t as aggressive as I was and had a beer.  I’m not sure what OLHNSH was drinking. 

I was explaining to Maddie how I know OLHNSH.  We had a nice time talking about the liquor store and how you can meet a lot of interesting people.  I could tell Maddie wasn’t going to make it much longer.  She was so tired.  I was too but I felt like I had to entertain him.  We all look over to the Birthday Girl and she’s at a total different level than us!  She has about 6 different good looking men surrounding her, she’s laughing and whipping her hair around.  She’s a sight.

The three of us laugh and I say “She’s young.”   I wish I were that young again. 

 “Cheetahtort – I’m sorry, I really need to go home.  I’m so tired I think I might fall into the lake and drown.” said Maddie.

I don’t blame her and really want to go as well.  Drinking in the sun all day really drains a body. 

“If you want to go home Maddie, I can walk Cheetahtort home.”  OLHNSH says thinking this might work out well for him.  “I’d be happy to!”  He adds and then tries to hold my hand and I move it out of the way awkwardly. 

Do I want to stay here with him?  I don’t even know him.  I’m not sure I even like him.  He’s not even cute – maybe even on the creepy side.  Why not, he’s a nice guy.  Let’s see what happens.  Maybe I’ll have a story to tell.

So I stay trying to be optimistic.  Maddie looks over at OLHNSH and says – “straight home – no funny business.  I know what you look like and I know where you live!”

He laughs and says “She’s in good hands.”

“Give me a call if you need me!” she says while giving me a big hug. 

“Oh, he’s harmless, what can he do?” I say back. 

What am I doing?  Is he harmless?  I’m not even sure he’s normal – he does drink a lot.  And he seems soooo eager!

“I’ve wanted to go out with you for a long time now, Cheetahtort.”  He says once Maddie is out of ear shot.  “I would love it if you were my girlfriend!  I would think I’ve made it if I had a girl like you as my girlfriend!” 

Wow!  Forward!  Uncomfortable!  Where did the shy guy from the liquor store go? 

He sees that I have an empty glass in front of me and instantly jumps up to get me a new drink.  While he’s away, Birthday Girl runs up to me and says “Cheetahtort – you crazy girl!  Who’s this guy?” 

“Oh he’s just one of my liquor store regulars.”  I say not really wanting to get into everything with her.  Especially because she won’t remember this conversation in the state she’s in. 

“He’s cute – good for you!  Have fun, lady!”

Cute?  I don’t believe I would describe him as cute.

He comes back with our drinks; I look at the drink he’s offering me trying to judge how long it will take for me to consume it, so I can go home.  At this point – the guy really hasn’t done anything wrong for me to feel this way – but I still get a creepy vibe from him.

I get half way through my drink and say – “I’m sorry OLHNSH I’m just so tired – I really need to be getting home.”

He looks sooo disappointed.  I don’t care – I just want to get home.

He takes my hand and says “OK – let’s get going.”

We walk down the street and across the bridge.  Once we get to the middle of the bridge – he grabs me and pushes me to the wall and kisses me.  He says “I’ve always wanted to do that to someone I love!”

“Oh my God – what are you doing?” I yell.

“Didn’t you think that was romantic?  I thought all girls liked that kind of stuff.” 

Yes, we do – but with men we actually know and at least like!

“But, I don’t know you!  Please don’t do that again!” 

We walk by his apartment on our way to Maddie’s apartment.  He says “I have to stop here to use the restroom.  Do you want to come up with me or do you want to wait out here?”

I ponder this question . . . Do I want to go up to this man’s apartment that I don’t know or do I want to stand here in the dark all by myself?  Which is the better option?

 I find out soon what the better option would have been.

I look around and say “Maybe I should go up with you.” 

He looks pleased and takes my hand. 

We go up to his apartment.  I’m expecting to see photos of me plastered all over his walls with little quote clouds saying how much we love each other.  Luckily I don’t.

When we get into his living room his cat rubs up against my leg.  “Meet your new Mommy!” he says bending over to pet his cat.  (RED FLAG!!!  RED FLAG!!!)

WHAT!!!!????????  I’m screaming in my head!!!  – where’s the door – I need to get out!!!  He just introduced me to his cat as its new Mommy! 

He stands up and starts to show me pictures of his family.  “They are going to love you – just as much as I love you.”     (RED RED FLAG!)

This has got to be a joke!  Am I on MTV’s Punked?  Seriously, this cannot be happening.  He’s really scaring me!  I really want out!

I smile at him – like anyone would looking at a crazy person trying not to spook them; trying to placate them until you can run.  And run like hell! 

But I don’t really know where I am.  I don’t know where Maddie’s apartment is from here.  This is where I really should be a strong woman and take care of myself and venture out into the darkness and find my own way home.  I truly believe this is the safest route for me to take.

“I really should be getting home.  I’ll let myself out.”

“Don’t be silly, I said I would walk you home and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

On our way out I look in his kitchen and see all the EMPTY cases of beer.   Really?  (“Cheetahtort – I don’t actually drink all those cases!  I only come in the store to see you and feel like I need to buy something!”)

Finally we are outside.  Oh thank goodness, we are on our way home.

Nope.

“Cheetahtort – I need to show you where you will park when you come to see me.  You’ll just come up this driveway and this is my garage.  Sweetie, you can park here.” he said, point to it.

Why does he think we are now a couple?  Why does he not see that I’m not happy and I’m now begging to go home?  Is he really this clueless that all I keep saying is that I really need to be getting home?

“Thank you OLHNSH but I really need to get going – Maddie is probably wondering where I am.  Remember she threatened you!”  I say trying to make light of this absolutely horrible situation I put myself into.

He comes up to me and gives me a kiss.  I turn my face. 

“Why did you turn your face?  I’m just trying to show you some loving.”

“Thank you – but I’m just so tired.  I need to get home.” 

“O.K. lets get this sleepy girl home.”  He takes my hand and we walk by his pool.  “This is where you’ll wear your cute bikini when we lay out by the pool together.”

“Um mmm . . . ”  I say not wanting to say another word to prolong this situation.

I finally recognize the area.  I know where I am. The relief washes over me.  I’m almost in my safe zone and away from this guy. 

Then I realize – I don’t have her key to get in the door!  I panic!  I didn’t bring a key!  Now what am I going to do? 

“I don’t have a key to her apartment!”  I hear myself scream. 

He smiles at me – takes my hand and squeezes it.  “Honey, you can stay with me.”

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!  There is no way in hell that’s going to happen! 

I realize I don’t even have my phone with me!  I thought maybe I could call Maddie to wake her up to open the door. 

“I don’t even have my phone!” I scream again and my hands rush to my face.  I feel faint.

“I have my phone.” He says.  “What’s her number?”

“I don’t know – who knows what other people’s phone numbers are these days!  It’s programmed into my phone!”

I yell up to her window “MADDIE!!!!!!  WAKE UP!!!!!  I’M DOWN HERE – OPEN THE DOOR!!!!!”

No answer.  I’m praying and realize it’s out loud.  “Please Lord, Please have her wake up!  Please, I promise to be good if you have her wake up and answer the door!”

I notice he’s staring at me and looks upset that I want her to open the door so badly.

I yell again – semi afraid that I will wake all the neighbors and they will call the police.  But on second thought that would be safer!

“MADDIE!!!!!!!!!  IT’S CHEETAHTORT!!!!!  OPEN THE DOOR!!!!!!”

Nothing.

The only thing I can think is – I know my own number and my phone is by her bed.  If she hears that ringing – maybe she’ll check it and answer it.  But this means giving this crazy man my number! 

I stand there weighing my options.  Do I spend the night out here with this crazy man?   NO, NO, NO!!  Or do I give him my number to call my phone and wake Maddie up!  If I give him my number – he HAS my number!  He’ll start to call me!  I don’t want that!

But, I know I really have no choice.

“Honey – it’s OK – you can spend the night with me!”  He says once again. 

I hang my head defeated.  “Can you try to call my phone number?  Maybe she’ll hear that?” I said just giving up.

“You bet!  What’s your number?”

I give it to him.  He calls. 

Maddie comes up to the window with my phone in her hand and yells from the window.  “What are you doing?!  I put the carpet in the door!  You can get in!”   The look on her face says I just woke her from the wonderful splendor of sleep and she was PISSED!

I run to the door!  The carpet is in the door!  Why oh why didn’t I check first!!!!

I turn and thank him for the walk home.  He says “Honey, let me walk you to the door.  I want to make sure you get in alright.”

“Oh, you’ve done enough tonight!  I’m done!  Goodnight!”

I pull the carpet lose and close the door.  I run to her apartment.  Never looking back. 

She’s standing there with the door open, tapping her foot, scowling at me.  “You woke me up – this better be good.”

I didn’t disappoint.

We laid in bed laughing about the whole scary situation and how I get myself into these predicaments!

Once she fell asleep again – I sat up and thought about how stupid I was to go with him alone.  Not a smart move on my part.

OSHNLH called me about a dozen times.  He still came into the store three times a week to buy his case of beer.  I never talked to him.  I would talk to the other customers around him– but NEVER to him. 

He continued to come in for another year.  But finally one day he stopped.  I thought I was free and clear of Mr. Scary.    

But . . . about two months after he stopped coming into the store he found me on a dating site and left me a message.  He said “See, even this site thinks we are a good match!”

Ugg.

I hate it when I get in my own way.

I hate it when I get in my own way.

I get home from celebrating my girlfriend’s birthday.  We had a great time seeing a band and having a few cocktails.   All her friends and I spent the night in a hotel room so we don’t drink and drive.

I drive home the next morning.  I get home and quickly change my clothes and barely look in the mirror  to run to Cub Foods  to get the fixings for Easter dinner the next day.  I feel alright but I don’t think I’m looking the best.  But I still go.   The store is packed with last-minute shoppers like myself.  I’m in the cheese section – the BEST section at the store!  I’m trying to decide if I want gouda or brie.   As I’m deciding – I look up to see a good looking man walking by checking me out.  I smile and look away remembering what I look like.  Then of course – glance again to find him still looking at me.  We both look away quickly.  It was like we both got caught checking each other out.  I think I even blushed being caught.  I smile and then start thinking – Was he looking at me?  Why would he be looking at me?  I look tired, not showered.  Maybe that’s what he’s thinking – “She should really look in a mirror before she goes out into public!”

He continues to leave the area and I continue with my shopping.  Now I’m on the mission to pick out the ham.  I’ve never had to buy a ham before and not sure what to buy.  That occupies my brain once again and the good looking man is now out of my thoughts.   I approach a couple “mom” looking women rifling though the hams and decide they know what they want.  Maybe they can help me?  I ask their advice and they tell me I want the butt section of the ham instead of the shank.  It has more meat.  They were very helpful.  I hope they are right.  I want this dinner to be really nice for my sister, her husband and my awesome nieces.  I wish them a Happy Easter and walk away with my butt section appreciating their help.

I go to dairy section for my half and half when I see the gentleman again.  He looks my way once again and smiles.  I return the smile.  This continues throughout the store!  The chips section (the second best part of the store), the candy section (hey not for me – my nieces need a cute chocolate bunny!) the frozen food section, the condiment section (I’m thinking – am I following him or is he following me?) and finally the check out area.

As I’m leaving, walking through the parking lot I see him again but I don’t think he sees me.  He’s walking to the far side of where my car is parked.  Then I see him coming up behind me as I get my keys out to open my car.  I think – no way, his truck is not right next to mine.  Yep it is – oh goodness here we go.

As I’m putting my groceries into my car – he says from behind his car “Do you think we’ll ever get a spring?”

I get all flustered.  He’s now talking to me!  Say something!  He’s asked you a normal human question!  You should be able to talk back!  You’re an intelligent woman!

“I don’t think so – I think spring forgot all about us.”

Awkward silence.

What can I say to him to keep this conversation going?  Don’t be a shy silly girl!

“I think we really deserve a nice summer with that horrible winter we just went through.”  I say – kicking myself that I didn’t ask him a question in return!

I now have to walk by him to put my cart in the cart corral.  He says something to me.  Honestly I don’t remember what he said – I’m not sure I really heard what he said because my inner dialog was screaming at me inside my head!  But I remember smiling back at him while my not washed hair is blowing in my face.    I put the cart in its place while yelling at myself for not looking better and why oh why did I wear these shoes!  They are my ugly black flats – not my usual cute high heeled shoes that always make me feel more confident!

I walk back to my car and start to get inside when he says “Well, I hope you enjoy the summer if it ever gets here!”  I smile at him and really get a good look at him.  He’s about 37 years old, maybe 40? He has dark hair and a really nice smile and eyes.

“Thank you!  I hope you do as well.” I say with a big smile while trying to get away and wishing I had the courage to say more.

I get in my car.  Breathe Cheetahtort!  Wait – don’t start your car yet.  Wait – don’t leave.  See if he does anything more!

I pull out my phone just trying to prolong my stay.  I stare at it because nobody has called and think this is silly.  Nothing happens. 

So I put my phone away, start my car and look for my seatbelt.  As I turn I look over at him.  He’s sitting in his truck smiling at me and actually gives me a wink.  I smile back, hesitate a second longer then begrudgingly drive away. 

I hate it when I get in my own way.

Did You Have Sex With Tiger? What?

Here's my first example:

I'm sitting at my desk at work (avoiding it and playing on Facebook) when I get a friend request from someone I don't know.  It says you are mutual friends with my friend Bethany. I work with Bethany so I run over to her cube and ask her "Who is Dillon ____?"  She says "I went to high school with him, why?”

"Well he asked me to be a friend on Facebook.  He looks kind of cute - is he a nice guy? and why would he be trying to befriend me?”

"Well, I'm sure it's because he thought you were good looking" Bethany said. 

"Should I befriend him?”  I said and she instantly said ”Oh you bet, he's a super nice guy.  I haven't talked to him in a long time - but if I remember correctly, he's a gentleman.”

So I befriend him and we talk through Facebook for the day, back and forth, really having a nice time getting to know each other.  Then he asks me for my phone number.  This is where I get a little nervous - but how else are you going to get to know someone - so I give him my number.

He calls me later that evening.  I'm having a glass of wine and talking to him, seriously having fun.  More fun than I've had in a long time.  So we decide to go out on a date.  We decide on my usual first date activity - the happy hour.  It’s only drinks so if you are uncomfortable - you can make a quick getaway. 

Sometimes I like to schedule a happy hour date right after work – so I have an excuse to wear my work clothes.  I feel a little more dressed up – wearing a cute skirt and top – and making it look like I got dressed up for work and not him.  I don’t want him to think I’m trying too hard.

As I’m driving to the dreaded first date – I get a bit nervous.  I think – what if?  What if this is my last first date?  What if I really like him and he doesn’t like me.  What if he’s another weirdo?  And of course I have to call my good friend, Maddie, to give me a pep talk.  Poor Maddie.  She gets all these calls.  She’s just waiting by her phone just expecting my call and instantly goes into her spiel.  “Don’t be nervous.  Remember he’s nervous too.  You’ll have a great time!  Take a deep breath.  You’ll do fine.  If he’s not the one – at least you’ll get a free glass of wine.  You are a beautiful woman.  Have Fun.  I’ll be waiting by the phone to hear all about it.” 

She’s the best and because of the amount I times I make this call; she should have her speech recorded.  I’m so nervous – I don’t think I’d notice. 

So I take my deep breath, check myself in the mirror once more and head in.

He’s actually waiting for me at the bar.  Most of my dates are late.  He gets a point!  I take a long look at him.  Hmmmmm - not exactly what I was hoping for - but still nice looking all the same.  Wow – he was as nervous as I was.  Maybe more so.  I think I even saw his hand shaking when he reached out to shake mine.  I thought it was endearing.  Could he possibly be a gentleman?

We sit and have a cocktail together.  We talk about things we discussed on the phone and bring up new conversations.  He asks me about past loves.  I tell him a very short abbreviated version of my life.  I don't want to get into that type of talk with a new friend. 

Now, if you remember, I've already accepted him as a friend on my Facebook page.  So he's been perusing me and my Facebook activity.  I have a lot on there about my friends.  While we are sitting at the bar – he asks me about my good friend Tiger.  I tell him he's my friend. 

We continue with small talk - when he goes back to Tiger and asks - "Did you have sex with Tiger?" 

What did he just ask me?  My jaw drops and I look at him with questioning eyes.  "What?  Why are you asking that?  I really don't think that is any of your business!"

"I’m just curious.  Did you?"  He says to me with a look like we've been together for so long and I've cheated on him. 

I sit in my seat thinking, I'm thinking too much.  He just wants to know.  Maybe it's not that big of a deal.  I smile to him and say "again, it's none of your business, let's play some darts."

He backs up and says "alright - let's play some darts, but I still want to know.”

We begin to play and I soon find out that he's very competitive.  So am I.  :)  I like to win.  And I do!  It’s very funny - funnier when he gets upset.  I think he's kidding, but I find out – he’s truly upset that he just got beat by a girl.  Well, I don't just find out that he's a sore loser, but a pervert . . .

While we are playing darts, he wants another beer.  He calls a waitress over by curling his index finger in a “come here” gesture.  Then he starts laughing out loud.  I stare at him wondering what the joke is.  He says – “look I just made her come with one finger!”

I couldn’t believe it!  I was shocked!  Did he really say that to a girl on a first date?  Is this his way of wooing me?  This is his mating call?  He told me on the phone earlier that he’s a nice respectable guy.  This is nice and respectable? 

Wait – there’s more J

I'm standing there, waiting for him to make his throw.  He slides up next to me and "accidentally" drops his darts.  He bends down to pick them up, get on his knees and starts to look up my skirt.  Yep - That's what I wrote!  He's literally down on the ground trying to sneak a peak at what he will never see in his life. 

This is where I say - "You know what?  I think this date is done."  I walk over to pick up my coat and say "goodnight".  He gets upset but can't really say anything but "I'm sorry - I was just kidding!"

I go home and instantly de-friend him on Facebook.

Later that evening - I get text messages saying "I can't believe you defriended me on Facebook!  It's not that big of a deal!  What's your problem?!" 

I ignore his texts.

A week later, I'm looking through my friend Tiger's Facebook page.  It says he's befriended Dillon.  I instantly call up Tiger and tell him he's befriended someone that just wants to see what I'm up to and stalk me through his Facebook.  I ask him to please de-friend him.  He does right away.  But, yep – there’s more!

A week later my friend Tiger calls me and tells me that Dillon called him to tell him what a stuck up person I am.  (Tiger has his phone number on his Facebook page and since has taken it off).  Tiger proceeds to say - "Don't ever call me again and if I hear you are bothering Cheetahtort - I will find you." 

So . . . . What do you think of my first example?  What are your thoughts?  Am I too picky? 

Oh just wait . . . it gets better!

Welcome

Hi!  I'm 100% new to this.  A friend of mine blogs all the time.  I asked him for help.  He told me about blogger.com.  So here I am. 

Funny that my friend Dave (mentioned above) is the one to help me start my new blog.  I went to Junior Prom with him.  That was a lifetime ago.  He was/is a true gentleman.  I haven't met too many since.  He is now married and a father of five.

The whole reason for this blog is for me to have a little fun with the dates I've been on - since I didn't have fun on the actual dates.  It might be therapeutic for me?  It might not.  We'll see how this progresses.  Maybe if I actually get followers - you can help me with the problems.  The problems may be with me and not them.  I may need your help with figuring that out.

Maybe, just maybe - this could also be a "What Not to Do" for the men out there.  But I'm sure they won't be reading this.  And if they do - would they care?  They are still going to be the "cave-men" they are.  But maybe not.  Maybe there are some men out there that really do need to see what not to do.

Maybe, just maybe, it will be sympathetic hug to women out there that are going through the same thing I'm going through.  You are not alone with the crazies!  Other women have problems meeting their "Mr. Right" too!  I'll share some of my friends’ stories as well.

Maybe it will be a reassurance to the women that are married, and think the grass is greener on the other side.  It's not ladies.  But I'm not one to say stay in a bad marriage.  Don't.  Don't let this blog sway you to stay.  You may be a lot luckier than me.  My friends are :)

So how do I start this . . . hmmmm well, maybe I'll introduce myself.

My name is Cheetahtort.  A nickname that I put together from a last name I had and a dress that I loved.

I'm a girly girl - but not too much so.  I love high heels - even though I'm 5'10".  The only cute shoes out there have a heel!  I'm seriously not trying to tower over the new prospects - but just want to be me.   

On a normal day I'm wearing jeans and a t-shirt.  But when I'm off to work I'm usually in a nice top with a skirt and high heels.  On date nights, I sit in my closet cursing my wardrobe, wishing I had the budget to buy something hot and cute for every date.  But I do the best I can and usually feel alright when I show up on the first date.  That's usually all I have - first dates.  Why only a first date?  I don't know!  Hence this blog.  Can you help me?

Side bar:  Why do women work so hard on what they are going to wear on a first date when the men show up with jeans, sweatshirt (that looks like they just might have taken it out of the hamper) and tennis shoes?  Why don't they take as much care as we do?

O.K.  Back to introducing myself.

I love all sorts of activities.  Skiing (downhill), boating (even try waterskiing sometimes but my friends make fun of my long legs), live music (going to concerts is always fun), running, working out, hiking, playing darts, reading, movies, watching someone cook for me, eating what they've just cooked for me, wine, relaxing by the pool with an umbrella in my drink, walking, and bonfires.  Seriously I'm just a normal girl that likes a good time with my friends and family.  I'm normal - or so I think.  After reading this blog you can be the judge.

Keep reading my posts - I promise to try to make it worth your time.